Much to Shameburger’s chagrin, I received an invite to see an advanced screening of Deadpool at noon on Thursday, replete with formidable-looking and dapper security guards supplied by Fox. [Editor’s Note: They also gave me a little toy souvenir because I was such a good boy.] Therefore, in my infinite wisdom as Editor in Chief of this fine publication, I decided to add a new category and start posting some of my TV and film reviews. What better choice for my inaugural edition than the current, most popular blockbuster in the world?

I thought that the 4th-wall breaking would grow stale alongside Ryan Reynolds’ extreme Ryan Reynolds-ing, but he really is quite good at being simultaneously silly and charming. Though I will manage to hate with a fiery vengeance all of the people who will inevitably try to poorly emulate his portrayal of Deadpool’s comedic style and delivery for the next year. Seriously, you have to be 10/10 handsome for this to work. If you are a normal person, just don’t do it. [Editor’s Note: #friendsofstretch.] And Morena Baccarin is one in a million. The average gutter skank, not fit to lick Vanessa’s bootheel, will only find you more repulsive. Just stop. No one likes you. Re-evaluate the life decisions you have made that caused you to wind up the person you have become.

One complaint about modern “superhero” movies is that the best interests of the target demographic (those of us old enough to have bought the comics as kids) are overlooked by studio execs in favor of a PG-13 version that has zero boobs and no brain splatter, all in the hopes that mom will load up the minivan and bring ALL the kids to the theater, not just surly teen boys with raging erections for violence. Deadpool jizzes in the face of that mentality with mega-gross-out one-liners and egregious gore. Some might call this approach sophomoric, but those detractors simply lack the appropriate sense of humor for this film. Sadly, the script has to constantly remind the audience that Mr. Pool is not a hero. So much so that it almost feels like they were trying too hard to come out ahead of the backlash from parental groups.

Now I know that I was supposed to fall in love with Morena Baccarin, and I did. In fact, I’ve been in love with her since Firefly, but by the end of the film, I found that my loins were yearning for Gina Carano. What can I say? I like ’em thick. Her monosyllabic portrayal of Angel Dust was an unexpected bonus to a film that was already worthy of the “blockbuster” moniker.

Overall, I liked this movie enough to see it again the very next night. If that isn’t a glowing recommendation, what is?

Deadpool (2016)
4/5 stars = Great